Memory Lane

Me & Krylon on a rooftop in SF, 8/11/14

There are few things in life as magical as taking a walk down memory lane with an amazing old friend.  The shared experience of re-telling and re-living moments that you have in common opens doors inside that seem to transport you right back to those very moments.  It's almost as if your common history is more alive now than it was when it was happening - it's like watching the movie of your own life.  So quickly with old friends the conversation turns to funny, outrageous or even touching moments that you have lived together.

     I met my gorgeous, soul-sister friend Krylon in 1993 when I had started working at a popular East Village haunt called Stingy Lulu's.  I was fresh out of rehab (if you didn't go to rehab in the early 90's you were doing it wrong) and had recently moved back to NYC after staying at my Mom's in upstate, NY for a few months.  I was working as a cashier at a crunchy health food store when I ran into my friend Toni from college.  She was tending bar at Lulu's and asked me if I would be interested in being a waiter.  This was like the golden ticket for a post-grad, 22 year old in the city.  Waitering jobs were great money, all cash and always included tons of free food and drinks.  The catch 22 was that it was impossible to get a waiting job in NYC w/o a tons of NYC waiting experience but you couldn't get experience if no one would hire you - unless, of course, your friend was the bartender that was tight with the owners!

     After I got hired they quickly asked me if I ever did drag.  I had done some in the past for fun but my look at the time was more Kiss-meets-David-Bowie, androgynous, gender-fuck, glam!  I hadn't done much actual drag that included shaving everything and wearing a bra.  I loved getting dressed up though and I immediately said yes and thus the adventure began.  There was an amazing, melting-pot crew of queens that worked at Lulus and we tore it up inside and outside of that place.  We would stop what we were doing, ignore all our tables and put on shows in the middle of the restaurant and even on top of tables filled with peoples meals.  The wilder we were the more the crowd and owners loved us.

     Krylon and I quickly bonded and became instant friends.  All we would do was laugh and carry on.  I had this self appointed rule that I would never repeat the same exact look twice so I was always coming up with crazy new outfits & styles.  Krylon had this joke that I could blend a toaster into my hair and people would think it was real.  I always wore my wigs mid-way at the scalp and left my real hair out in front that way the hair line and part was always natural.  I could literally have a pink afro on and people would ask me if it was my real hair!  We joked about my hair everyday - the cheaper the wig the better and I always had so many bobby pins in my head that I could've picked the locks at Fort Knox.

     One night during my shift I called a drug dealer from the restaurant phone (cell phones were not in the picture in 1993) that would always meet you around the corner in a town car.  You'd hop in, they'd drive around the block while your transaction took place then drop you off near where they had picked you up.  I ran out the door of Lulu's, mid-shift, on a really busy night and sprinted like a gazelle across the street in stilettos.  Well, of course, my heel snapped off mid flight and came right off my shoe completely.  I snatched it up, hopped in the town car to get my stash then realized I had no back up pair and still had to work all night long.  When the car dropped me off I hobbled to the nearest bodega (deli, convenient store, whatever you happen to call them) and bought a huge roll of duct tape.  I got back to the restaurant and I taped that damn shoe and heel directly to my foot and ankle - I used so much tape that it was more sturdy than the shoes were to begin with.

     That particular night Krylon and I went out after work at 2am, closed down a local bar then went to an infamous after-hours club on Ave. B called Save The Robots.  We didn't get out of there until 9am which meant we were in our stilettos for at least 15 hours straight!  Even though I didn't have spare shoes I never, ever left the house in drag without a pair of sunglasses - 9am wasn't an unusual time to get home back then.  Ah, the folly of youth.

     Now, Krylon lives in SF and is an amazing band called Double Duchess and, basically looks exactly the same, if not better, than when we met as baby drag queens a jillion years ago.  It's a trip to think of how many lifetimes we each lead on this planet.  Krylon and I met 21 years ago and even though we don't see each other enough when we do it's the same as it was back then - except we are both super healthy and sober now.   I don't think any of us realized how magical that time was as it was happening.  Almost everyone that we knew and loved lived within a 10 block radius of each other in the East Village.  Now, we are all dispersed but the connections will forever be the same beautiful, loving, fun connections they were in the beginning.

Some of the Lulu's crew - Krylon and Me top left.

     

     

Living In The Eighties.

my 1st yr. at college, 1988

Growing up in Upstate, NY I didn't have the opportunity to see a tremendous amount of live music.  I did manage to see some really big bands at the time like Duran Duran and The Eurythmics and I even saw Crosby, Stills and Nash - all the freaks hung out together so there was a certain level of "hippie" music that was acceptable especially on lots of LSD.  My teenage self drew the line at The Grateful Dead and even though I really didn't know their music that much I detested them on principal.
     Of course, I went to tons of obligatory hardcore matinees at the local VFW halls and saw a million bands with acronyms like C.O.C., MDC, D.R.I., D.OA. but I really didn't love any of those bands and I kind of hated those shows.  I never really felt safe with the mosh pits swirling around me, especially in the mid-80's when they were pretty violent and punks had A LOT of sharp hardware on their jackets.  I was obsessed with The Butthole Surfers after I heard their genius cover of "American Woman" on the local college radio station and I got to see them at SUNY Buffalo in 1986 - it was a pretty life changing show.  They had 2 drummers, a topless gogo dancer with her head shaved like she was having chemo and her teeth coverered in tin foil, videos on loop of child birth superimposed with ants furiously crawling out of an ant hill and Gibby, the singer, was wearing a yellow, old lady, housedress and had his long hair sprayed straight up in the air about 2 feet tall.  I was hooked.
     Really, though, I was way more into dark wave and goth music and was obsessed with every band that was on the 4AD label at the time.  The Cocteau Twins, The Dead Can Dance, Clan Of Xymox, This Mortal Coil to name a few.  I was also into everything new wave and, of course, my all time favorite for life was and is Siouxsie & The Banshees.  These bands didn't really pop by Schenectady, NY at all though.
     Everything changed for me the second I went away to college though.  I went to an artsy state school called SUNY Purchase which was about an hour outside of NYC.  Suddenly, a whole world of live music and opportunities opened up for me and it was a magical time to say the least.  Within the course of my 1st year away at college I got to see a ton of my all time fav bands.  The Cocteau Twins and The Dead Can Dance played within the same week and I even managed to get front row seats for The Dead Can Dance!  I saw Skinny Puppy on Halloween night at Irving Plaza with NIN as an opening act, it was 1988.  The stoic NY crowd literally stood still, arms crossed for all of Nine In Nails set no one could care less at the time.
     The cherry on top of the giant, musical,  ice cream sundae was, of course, Siouxsie & The Banshees at Radio City Music Hall for their Peepshow tour just 6 days before my 18th Bday!!  I'll never forget that night and exactly how I looked.  I was so happy because my blue-black crimped hair came out perfect that day and it was never bigger than it was for that show.  I had on my favorite, vintage, paisley vest on top of all black, of course, tons of black eyeliner, and was wearing a collection of antique rosary beads that my goth-est friend had given me (stolen from her grandma.)  I bought the tickets for me and some friends the day they went on sale - back then you actually called the ticket line until you got through and placed your order over the phone if you weren't able to physically wait in line outside the venue.  I got us seats in row S which doesn't sound so bad until you realize that Radio City Music Hall is set up with rows AA - ZZ and then rows A - Z, essentially we were in row 45 with the balcony overhead so it seemed even farther away.  Before the show started I had met some over-the-top goth girls by the bathroom that liked my hair and thought I was really cute.  About 4 songs into the show they walked by my row and when they saw me they grabbed me and brought me all the way down to their seats which were smack dab in the center of row 4!!!!  I had the best night ever, I could almost touch Siouxsie.  The friends that I ditched were none too pleased and during the ride back to college you could cut the tension and silence with a knife - inside I was reeling though.  That show is forever etched in my memory.
     My friends at school and I also went to tons of shows at CBGB's and The Pyramid Club.  We'd all pile into my hatchback and get on the highway into NYC to see all the best/wildest local bands at the time.  We'd go to the East Village every time The Lunachicks, The Voluptuous Horror Of Karen Black or a little local band (at the time ) White Zombie played.  Those shows were so crazy and fun and I even ended up becoming friends with all 3 of those bands.  Back then the scene was so much smaller and if you looked outrageous, as we all did, and went to every show eventually you got to hang out with all your favorite bands.  I made some of my best, life-long friends at seedy, beer-soaked punk clubs.  Looking back I don't think anyone realized what a special time it was - we were all young and unencumbered by real life and auto-tune was yet to be the standard in most music.

Set list for the Siouxsie show, 1988