Saturday, February 13, 2016

Youth & Beauty

John Waters, 2008

Over Christmas I had an amazing conversation with a friend of my mom's that has stuck with me.  She's a much older woman who was spunky and funny and had me laughing the whole time.  I loved her long, red lacquered nails and her tales of being a crazy old cat lady whose house is over run by a dictatorship of cats in which she is merely a tenant! We were talking about age and I mentioned that my mom would be 70 this year.  She said she wished she was only turning 70 and that life really does speed by.  She told me that when she was a young and driven career woman (real estate) in her power suit that she thought she had everything all figured out and that she'd always be on top of her game.  At the time she met a much older woman that told her you will never be as young and strong as you are right now and that life goes by fast so don't take it for granted.  She thought the woman foolish but now in hindsight she sees the woman was right.
     That conversation has always stuck with her as I'm sure her re-telling of it will always stick with me.  Age, it's a very funny thing.  Of course, lifestyle completely dictates how age effects you.  The most beautiful people I meet are the one's whose inner radiance shines out.  People that are beautiful inside are always beautiful on the outside too even if they don't look like Cindy Crawford or Brad Pitt.  Still, the body does break down eventually and there is no real fountain of youth.  The people you see that are obsessed with staying young on the outside usually resort to procedures that leave them looking not young but insane.  Like we all knew exactly how old Joan Rivers was and her surgeries only made her look like a crazy puppet but not any younger.  To each their own though and if that fulfilled some need inside her then so be it.
     I am lucky that my metabolism and my genes are strong - there is so much longevity on both sides of my family, even the crazy alcoholics live into their 90's.  That being said I also try and have fun in my life and maintain a childlike wonder with the world.  Sure, I have my days were my moods take over and I wear jealous or bitter colored shades but, luckily, those moments pass and I am able to see beauty in the world, my world, again.  Perhaps, it's because I know some deep, down and dirty hardships and I was able to emerge from them with not only surviving but also thriving.  Maybe the intense pain I have felt in life has made me aware of and more capable of feeling and noticing the joy and happiness as well.
     People are always shocked when I tell them that I'm 45.  In fact, I've had to procure my driver's license on occasion to prove my point.  I mean, why anyone who's not 16 would lie upwardly about their age is beyond me but I ain't got no shame in my game.  I've said it before but I operate under the philosophy that the best is yet to come.  At no point in my life do I ever want to be the type of person who thinks his glory days are behind him.  That is too depressing.  John Waters always says that you should never trust anyone who thinks of high school as their golden years.  I say AMEN & PRAISE BOWIE to that!!  Speaking of which we are going to see John Waters live tonight doing one of his hysterical and poignant lectures.  He's a prime example of someone who is aging well.  He doesn't look 20 and why should he he's 69 and he looks fab in his Comme Des Garçons suits.  He's witty and wise and his tongue is no less sharp than it's ever been.  I think that always moving forward and laughing at one's self as you're doing it is what keeps us vital and vibrant and young at heart.  This is a filthy fucking world but as long as you can recognize the shit you can appreciate the beauty of the rose as well.






3 comments:

  1. I am glad you are writing about this. I am a bit older than you (53), and I remember how my mid-forties were a game of hide and seek with aging--it was still easy to not think about, most days. It is harder to ignore now, and though I also have good genes and take care of myself, I am aware that the biggest threat at this time is how my thinking ages. There is so much emphasis in Los Angeles to not give up on sex or goals or ambition or love, and yet what if all of those things naturally become less important, supplanted by intimate quiet exchanges and simple pleasures? Why does everyone insist that I cannot possibly be 53? Why can't I just be that?
    There is no template for aging today. We all try to brush it off, yet the next day we are tearing down Madonna for still showing her tits and ass. Which is it? I find that what works for me is similar to what you do--I choose my own path and adjust at will. I have no interest in keeping up with what the culture has decided I should be doing with my age.

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